People always think that happiness is a faraway
thing,” thought Francie, “something complicated and hard to get. Yet, what
little things can make it up; a place of shelter when it rains - a cup of
strong hot coffee when you’re blue; for a man, a cigarette for contentment; a
book to read when you’re alone - just to be with someone you love. Those things
:: family bbq in the park :: heaps of fresh fruit and veges from the markets (juice. lots of juice) :: Clementine and Gracie :: making a present (dollar store mugs and a porcelain pen) :: train trips :: wearing lots of temp tattoos for new pack releases this week (wishing I could keep the camera):: Six
(teeny bit crustier than necessary. I forgot it was in the oven)
I made some bread with Rolley a few weeks ago and loved it so much I bought a paper sack of bakers flour, borrowed a recipe book from the library and haven't stopped. I love the mixing, the kneading, the anticipation as you wait for the dough to rise, the yeasty smell, the baking, the warm smell of fresh bread all through the house, and Oh! right out of the oven with butter and perhaps a little honey. I even like finding bits of flour and dried dough in unexpected places (elbow, anyone?)
Ok, honestly sometimes kneading can get a bit tedious, then I try to get
all zen and meditative, or just channel any frustrations. Also I have a
slight wheat intolerance. But with lots of friends around a loaf rarely lasts overnight, and it's just not enough to stop me.
So far I have made Indian naan bread (little bit too thick), banana loaf (teeny bit burnt), pizza bases (accidentally made enough dough for 8 bases), tuscan bread (wee bit sunk), baguettes (boomerang shaped to fit on the oven tray), cob loaves (hollowed out and filled with cheese and spinach dip for family bbq) and apricot walnut loaf (slightly crustier than anticipated. I forgot it was in the oven.) And they were all delicious!
I'd also like to try ciabatta, bagels, pretzels, cinnamon scrolls, gingerbread, apple bread, rye bread, sourdough bread, bread pudding, focaccia and mixed grain spelt bread.
Beginnings are such fragile things. They hold a touch of the end in them, I think. Full of promise and expectation you cannot help but peer at the the paths ahead, imagine where they may take you, where you hope it will, and what you risk if it does not. It is this fragile sense of hope tampered with risk and mixed with plans that make up a beginning, soft and not fully formed. I hold beginnings carefully in my hands and keep them safe, treading lightly, wanting to turn over a new leaf, pull my socks up, put my best foot forward.
If treated too roughly, beginnings can show signs of should-have-done-it-this-way. They can be tainted with should-have-done-it-better, or completely dissolve into puddles of could-have-been. If we don't pay attention and learn no lessons we find ourselves with the worst case; never-should-have. Beginnings are such fragile things.
At some unknown point, you look down and see what once was fragile and delicate has hardened and become the utilitarian everyday. And everything you thought and dreamt and imagined at the beginning, all the action and tasks, all the words and gestures and touch, have become habit. And you hope they are good ones, because it's hard to change now.
I am holding a few beginnings now. A new relationship with my best friend who lives far away. A new business growing every day. A new degree in Visual Arts starting in a few weeks. New housemates and friends, and new traditions. A new start with this pretty new blog. I have so many hopes and ideas and love for all of these things.
I haven't written a post for ages and ages, months it seems, and I was wondering why. I like blogging, I do, I like sharing with friends and family, I like posting pretty pictures, I like thinking about all the good things in my days; but I was not compelled to write anything at all. Then I realised that I didn't like the name. Not one bit. Nope.
So I moved over here, and am going to go read up on all my favourite blogs, and get all inspired again. I might post a few retrospective posts with photos, is that terribly naughty? I'm not sure.
:: picking flowers :: crochet bedspread made by Rolley's Nan :: pretty silver and opal ring he gave to me, isn't it pretty! :: Rolley and his nephew Darcy :: unexpected prettiness on the way home :: delicious easy dinners :: driving in the country :: making bread together
:: family birthday (isn't the cake fantastic!) :: new duck named Gracie :: sister trip to Ikea :: Juniper :: amazing dinners with friends :: nieces birthday (another amazing cake) :: possum visitor :: simple breakfast :: Six :: duck noodle soup (shh don't tell Clementine)
I took the train to my friends place in the country, to help out during a difficult time. It was good to see my friends again, enjoy the sunshine and hang out with the animals, but I wish it was not for so sad a reason. My thoughts are with them as they adjust to life after so much grief.