I'm a day late for whatcha wearin wednesday, but that seems to be my modus operandi (ooh latin. a bit of a nerd eh?) doesn't it. A day late, lagging behind but not far. Ah well, today feels like Friday but it’s not and I’m trying to pretend it’s Wednesday. Yep. Well, yesterday and today I am wearing stockings. With ladders.
I have stocking issues. This is well known at my workplace, where you might wander into the kitchen to make a cup of tea and see me writhing in the corner and hoisting layers of clothing around in an attempt to hitch up my stockings that are sliding woefully down my thigh and pooling around my knees. Stockings are always too short. I have been vertically blessed (read: tall) and my.legs.are.long. You know that pretty graph on the back of stocking packets so you can see which size to purchase? I am not on it. I'm somewhere 3 cms off the packet. Like my legs which seem to be a foot longer than stockings.
Tights are thicker and resist laddering, but are less stretchy, and wearing your crotch low can result in an unattractive waddle, and the aforementioned hoisting process. I have a few pairs that I cut the crotch completely out, and that works well, the tights cover my legs and my skirt covers the missing crotch, but I can’t help but feel a bit naughty and a bit silly, like wearing no undies.
I like stockings though. I like wearing them to work with heels and feeling professional. I like the way they make my legs shiny or dark, and I like the sound they make when I cross my legs under my desk. So I persevere. Even when the average time before ladders snake up my calf is one and a half days. I duly note brands that stretch the furtherst and last the longest, but draw the line at the thick flesh coloured stockings that nurses wear and give me legs that look the skin off an old custard pudding.
.
I will persist. Most days I get out of the house without snagging on a fingernail or ripping down the thigh from yanking. Meanwhile, I collect stocking receipts in the hope that I can claim them on tax, and continue to writhe in the corner of the coffee room.
Confession: I stole the picture for the "samson and delilah" post from visualizeus....but you mentioned a movie? is it from a movie? Which one? Now you've got me curious :)
ReplyDeleteHave a lovely afternoon!
I have to say "modus operandi" has oddly been a term I've heard all over the past few days. In some different shows I was watching and then with different people. Just had to say it's such a coincidence to see it again.
ReplyDeleteAnd- HECK YES, I completely understand your tights problem as I have the exact same frustration unfortunately. I do not wear them as often as possible but I do also agree I like the confidence and professional feeling they give whenever I do have to wear them and they are actually fitting right.
Pepper, your tight dilemmas have given me my first giggle of the day. Thank you!
ReplyDeleteI must tell you I have tight dilemmas too. But I'm not tall, am on the chart, and buy my size, but still find myself tentatively yanking them up... perhaps I waddle and that causes the slide, 'tis a mystery!
you know I hear you baby!!!!
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